Milkshake Act Of 2019: Great Britain Will Soon Require Their Citizens To Register For Milkshake Licenses
All parliamentary members of Great Britain unanimously signed into law the Milkshake Act of 2019, which would require all citizens who want to indulge in that tasty treat to register for a license. This bill was co-written into law by Brexit Party leader Nigel Farage and internet personality turned politician Carl Benjamin, better known as Sargon of Akkad.
Milkshake Act of 2019 is set to go in effect on August 1st of this year. Any citizen who wants a milkshake "must get themselves a liocense," according to a joint statement from UK's parliamentary members.
Benjamin received multiple milkshakings in May while Farage was also hit with a milkshake in separate mildly-violent attacks. These attackers have been labelled as "protesters" by media outlets such as The New York Times, Vox, The Washington Post, and even Business Insider. These incidents reportedly caused a stir among British political circles, with people wondering who will be next to be milk-shaked.
"That'll show those brats," said Benjamin referring to both the milkshake act and the protesters who pelted him with milky projectiles. "Seriously though, I would not even milkshake them."
Police in Scotland had to prevent a McDonalds near Edinburgh from selling their customers milkshakes during a Farage rally. Meanwhile, Burger King is totally cool with their customers buying their milkshakes in the meantime, according to their Twitter page.
"A united Britain means ya gought to curb them dirty milkshaking chunkin's," said Farage in a statement to Flake News. "They don't know who the bloody hell they done messed with. Oi, to the wild-eyed protesters, better run along and get a hold of the milkshake liocense before you get ya muggy locked up, crazy little buggers."
Photo by Gage Skidmore from Peoria, AZ, United States of America | CC-BY-SA-2.0