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Hunchback Of Notre Dame: My Bad, I Left The Toaster On

Hunchback Of Notre Dame: My Bad, I Left The Toaster On

Two weeks ago, the world watched its oldest catholic cathedral - the Notre Dame - burn to the ground.

Words could not express the intense, collective emotions of losing one of Earth’s greatest treasures - a marvel of architecture, a spiritual centerpiece and a church that had witnessed close to 900 years of Paris’ turbulent history. All that reduced to smoke and rubble...but why, how?!

“Oh man, I think I left the toaster on!” exclaimed Quasimodo, the Hunchback of Notre Dame, as he stood there among the three or four hundred angry Parisians at the base of the church as it burned. Quasimodo was in disguise, wearing a Stetson hat and a duster jacket.

“This is sooo bad! Wow! Couldn’t put it on a timer, could you Quas?” He muttered to himself and looked around. He looked behind him and on both sides and saw an angry mob of Parisians.

He suddenly had flashbacks to 188 years ago when a crowd of angry Parisians tried to lynch him.

“Man, I have got to get out of the city!

“But where?” Quasimoto said as he slipped into the crowd, never to be heard from by anyone in Paris again.

Two weeks later this ad popped up in the Glendale, California Craigslist Housing section.

I HAVE A HUNCH...YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE ME!

Hi, my name is Quasimoto, I have a huge hump on my shoulder. But I do not have any chips on my shoulder. I am spiritually clean, sound and renewed and I believe very heavily in vibes. Incense, candles ... as long as we remember to blow them out...

I don’t play the guitar but I do play the bells. ...

I currently weigh 350 pounds and can bench twice that. Good at scaring rodents and burglars away. A soft heart for only one woman. No threat to your romantic situation whatsoever.

Bottom line: I can help spruce our place up. I have one really good eye for decoration.

 

Photo by Philippe | CC-BY-SA-3.0

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