Trump Reenacts 'Home Alone' In White House, Forces Pence And Kushner To Play 'Wet Bandits'
The Holiday Spirit has caught Donald Trump. In his 12 hours of TV time a day, he was able to fit a Christmas movie into his schedule — the classic 90s film, “Home Alone.” The Macaulay Culkin vehicle gave Trump an idea. Trump announced he was going to reenact the entire film in the White House, starring himself as Kevin McCalister.
Now you can’t have “Home Alone” without the Wet Bandits — so Trump forced Mike Pence and Jared Kushner to play them. The always chatty Jared would play Harry. And the always-around-doing-nothing Mike Pence would play Marv.
Trump declared the beginning of the movie was boring and insisted they jump right to the prank portion. So the president followed around White House interns as they set up the various pranks from the movie. Trump first started by shooting Kushner and Pence with a BB gun. Then they moved on to the more physical pranks.
Even with advance knowledge of the pranks, the blind loyalty Pence and Kushner both have for Trump led the pair to take on the humiliating punishment. As Trump threw paint cans at the duo, he shouted “Cut!” like he was on a Hollywood movie set.
The president then took one of his cans of hairspray and a lighter and flamethrowered Kushner’s hair — forcing Ivanka’s hubby to grab onto a heated door handle. Pence did not get off as easy. As Trump pushed Pence down an icy flight of stairs, POTUS decided one spider was not enough and surpris attacked the veep with a shower of Tarantulas.
The reenactment was only cut short after Ivanka hit both Pence and Kushner over the head with a shovel, knocking the two unconscious, finally ending not only the movie but their punishment for listening to such an awful human. The pair is reportedly hoping Trump doesn’t discover “Home Alone 2” or the next visit to New York might become a little more painful.