And Justice For All
It's a dangerous time to be a man in America. If your name is Brett. I just yelled at a Copper Fit commercial because Brett Favre was in it. Poor Brett Favre. His only crime is being named Brett. I shouted to the TV, “I don't have low back pain, Brett Favre. Because I do yoga and not aggressive man sports like football where you tackle each other and whatnot. And while we're on the subject of aggression, why do all the Brett Kavanaugh supporters keep talking about how he forcefully defended himself? Forcefulness is common trait among rapists.”
Poor Brett Favre aside, it's mostly only a dangerous time to be a man in America if you're a rapist. I can't help but notice those worried about men being falsely accused are people known to be kind of rape-y. Like the president. And his sons. And Clarence Thomas. Even Bill Cosby's spokesperson defended Brett Kavanaugh.
This reminds me of Bill O'Reilly's imaginary War On Christmas. It also reminds me of Bill O'Reilly because he's kind of rape-y. The imaginary War On Christmas started when Americans who aren't members of the Christian faith asked for their rights to be acknowledged. They said, “Hey, remember freedom of religion and separation of church and state? That means you can't put the Ten Commandments and a nativity scene on the courthouse lawn.” Bill O'Reilly was all like, “Christians are being persecuted. They have declared a war upon Christmas. Our rights are being taken away.”
The truth was Christians hadn't lost any rights. They'd been helping themselves to rights they never had. And just like Bill O'Reilly Christians, Bill O'Reilly rapists have been helping themselves to rights they never had. Rape is not a right. Although, I can see how Brett Kavanaugh has confused rapists. When a rapist appears in court it's usually as the defendant, not the judge. And that Ten Commandments thing probably didn't help either. Not a single commandment about rape. What's up with that?