UNBIASED POLITICAL SATIRE & HUMOR FOR SNOWFLAKES LIKE YOU.

We Only Report What We Want to Hear. You Decide.

 

Hillary's Emails May Reveal Why She Stood By Bill After Affair

Hillary's Emails May Reveal Why She Stood By Bill After Affair

A series of confidential emails discovered during a congressional investigation of Hillary Clinton's handling of her online account are said to contain correspondence revealing that the former first lady believed oral sex meant ‘talking dirty’ rather than an actual physical act. 

In transmissions Ms. Clinton exchanged with her aides and friends she strongly defended her husband despite evidence to the contrary.  Some of her comments suggested she considered the attention given to Monica Lewinsky as “much ado about nothing,”  “a typical right wing hatchet job” and “not something Bill would do.”

And it’s those responses that may answer the perplexing question many people still have as to why she stubbornly stood by her husband. It may also explain why the then President Clinton found it necessary to find a willing partner rather than his wife.

According to the source, speaking off the record, emails indicate that some months after her husband left office Ms. Clinton had a falling out with an unidentified individual. That’s apparently when the individual told the former New York Senator of the term’s true meaning. However, believing such a thing ‘wasn’t even humanly possible’ Ms. Clinton sternly rebuked her friend who then responded with charts, graphs and illustrations.

A wave of angry emails followed in which the one time Secretary of State raged not only against the person who made her aware of the ‘process’, as she called it, but the many other people who let her believe otherwise. Ms. Clinton also noted that she had eventually come to realize that the phrase ‘blow job’ did not refer to 'short-term employment' as some members of the White House staff had told her.

Although she has amassed an impressive resume in the years since, Ms. Clinton has also had a number of very public setbacks. They include her marriage to an overachieving good old boy; her failure to advance in a primary campaign against a little known black man and, following that, blowing a sure thing against a crazy white one.

Said a one-time friend of hers’, “No matter what she does, Hillary will always be remembered as the woman who got screwed by three Presidents.”

 

 
Faithless Pecker Imperils Trump

Faithless Pecker Imperils Trump

Trump Signs Off On New 5-Star ‘Presidential Standard’ Prison ‘Trump Dungeons’

Trump Signs Off On New 5-Star ‘Presidential Standard’ Prison ‘Trump Dungeons’