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Schumer Cancels Press Conference To Find His Glasses

Schumer Cancels Press Conference To Find His Glasses

Today, Senator Chuck Schumer, along with other Democratic House and Senate leaders, anticipated a press conference outside of the Supreme Court building to protest the current nomination of Brett Kavanaugh. At their dismay, the press conference was cancelled last minute due to a inconvenience with Senator Schumer’s setup. As Senator Schumer approached the podium, ready to give an anguish-filled speech, the Senate Minority leader reached into his pocket looking for his glasses. Frantically patting himself down, Senator Schumer exclaimed, “I’m sorry folks we’re going to need to reschedule this press conference-- it seems I must have misplaced my eyeglasses and there’s no press conference without the Democratic leader, right?” 

While the New York Senator believed he misplaced his glasses, the entire press community tried to draw Schumer’s attention to the fact that his glasses were actually on his head the entire time. “Senator! Senator! One remark Senator!” a reporter from CNN shouted from the press crowd trying to get Senator Schumer’s attention. Schumer answered these attention-grabbing shouts by saying, “please folks! I can’t see anything. I can barely even see you. Please respect my disability. I cannot answer any questions.” Despite Senator Schumer’s resistance, a correspondent from Fox News proceeded to shout, “Senator Schumer! Your glasses are on your head! Please, just try to pat your head,” to which Schumer responded, “that’s it for today folks. I’m going to need to go check my office for my other pair of glasses.”

 

 

Despite Senator Schumer walking off the podium, he still had a microphone attached to his back, thus we were able to hear all the behind scenes of his journey to locate his glasses. Immediately after leaving the press conference, correspondents remained outside to her Schumer tell his assistant, “why don’t you have extra pairs of these? How in the holy hell could I lose my eyes? (audio of him throwing his speech at his assistant and proceeding to shout at his staff) Where are my goddamn spectacles, Cindy?” 

While the press conference may have been rescheduled, Democratic members had much to say regarding today’s event. Rep. Nancy Pelosi expressed her concern for the senator’s search for sight and exclaimed she would “from now on, bring extra glasses so our Senate minority leader will be able to serve his party correctly.”

While some members of his party were supportive, other members were concerned by this incident. Junior members of the United States Senate, like Senator Corey Booker, spoke up. “I’m sorry, I just struggle with this incident. That’s something my grandpa would really do and yet he represents the party of the youth. I mean, I tried. I really tried to tell him his glasses were on his head.” Schumer’s staff has still not commented on whether or not he found his glasses, but they have said they will be purchasing “that little string that wraps around his head so they never fall off and he can just follow the string next time.” 

 

 

Photo by Mobilus In Mobili  ||  CC-BY-SA-4.0 International

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