A Shotgun From Alabama Is Running For Congress
A twelve-gauge shotgun has decided to run for a seat representing Alabama’s 37th Congressional District. The firearm will be running as a Republican. Shelldon the Shotgun has no formal political background, but has been an active member of various neighborhood watch groups. The Shotgun hopes to take on congress with a bang. He already endorsements from many pro-gun groups that endorsed him sight unseen upon learning he was a shotgun.
“I have been in schools, restaurants and parks, basically anywhere the people are. I want to be around as many people as possible,” Shelldon the Shotgun fired at us.
The Shotgun is hoping to not only take out the democratic candidate, but also anyone who is in his way. Shelldon is known for having a quick trigger and not being afraid to blast off at a moments notice. He says the only thing deadly about him is his desire to change people's minds.
Shelldon has been running a very child-centric campaign, hoping to latch onto them at an early age. “I just want to get face to face with as many kids as I can. I feel like they will really understand me once I look them in the eyes,” he playfully told a group of worried teachers.
Shelldon knows he faces many obstacles but really hopes people look past his appearance. The congressional hopeful wants to protect the people and doesn’t care if a few get hurt in the process. The Shotgun feels the only way to stop a bad congress is a good congress with a gun.
Photo by DXR || CC-BY-SA-4.0 International