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Russia Releases Proof Of Trump's Scandalous Love Letter To Putin

Russia Releases Proof Of Trump's Scandalous Love Letter To Putin

A Russian diplomat released scandalous evidence of President Donald Trump’s relationship with leader Vladimir Putin. Rumors have swirled for years that Russia has an explicit tape filmed with Trump and a Russian escort. But, according to sources, no such tape exists.

The diplomat explained, “Donald Trump has always been a germaphobe. Why would he allow someone to do such things to him? If he hates germs, why would he sleep with a lady of the night?”

When pressed further, the source admitted that what they had on file was much more compromising than the rumored tape.

“The dirt we have on the president is a love letter he wrote to Vladimir Putin in 2016. That’s right, a love letter written in crayon.”

 

 

Allegedly, the letter was composed in orange crayon and asks Putin if he would like to be Trump's boyfriend.

Here is an excerpt from the letter:

Pooty Poot,

I greatly admire your leadership. I feel very very funny when I look at you. Specially when you have no shirt on. Dozens of people have called me to tell me. They say that you are a really really hot man. Including Jared Kushner.

Another section of the letter details:

Let me be your boyfriend.  Please circle;  Yes   No   Maybe

Mike Pence responded to the allegations by saying, “We are fighting so hard to end all rights to the gay community, and here our president is writing homoerotic love letters to Vladimir Putin. He needs to be impeached immediately. We have supported Trump adamantly, but this administration is drawing the line. Donald Trump will not be the first gay president.”

Dante Cervantes, head of the LGBQT community, stated, “If the rumors are true, then he needs to come out of the closet. We will love you, Donald.” 

In the wake of these scathing reports, Trump issued this response: “America thinks I’m gay. Sad. I never wrote a love letter to Putin.”

 

 

A day later, he retracted the statement and said, “I did write parts of a letter to Putin, but not in orange crayon. It was red crayon. And I didn’t write the gay parts. That was boner-boy Steve Bannon.”

Trump’s new lawyer, Rudy Giuliani issued this statement: “So what? There’s nothing illegal about writing love letters to the Russian president. Obama sucks.”

Lastly, Putin said, “I have no desire to have Donald Trump as my girlfriend unless he can assure me he can get re-elected.”

 

Photo by Kremlin.ru  ||  CC-BY-4.0 International

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