White House Kept Abreast Of Stormy Daniels Arrest
Stormy Daniels was arrested Wednesday in Columbus, Ohio for telling the truth and listening closely to sad-sack stories of undercover agents’ childhoods. When she went the next step and clasped them to her rather extensive bosom (which was bare at the time – this being a strip club) she was handcuffed and led away by the formerly enthusiastic police-affiliated audience members.
No charges were pressed, as she did not actually break any actual laws, but the graphic of her under arrest and incarcerated was enough to cause celebration in one tiny corner of the United States of Eastern Europe. The first lady of the nation graciously visited yet another detention center for children of immigrants who work to make a living but are not tall enough or pretty enough to get some two bit millionaire to marry them, in order to flaunt her freedom and wealth in the children’s faces in celebration of Stormy’s arrest.
One of the undercover police officers complained of facial bruising from being bludgeoned by Daniels’ assets and is seeking recompense. Another said he thoroughly enjoyed the experience and dropped a fiver in her tip jar. The third said she was slightly traumatized by fear that the overly-enlarged glands would suffocate her and has been having flashback dreams all week.
Stormy Daniels’ Lawyer could not be reached for comment.
Photo by Toglenn || CC-BY-SA-4.0