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White Nationalist Candidates Offer Hope For Racialist-Curious Voters Across America

White Nationalist Candidates Offer Hope For Racialist-Curious Voters Across America

For those white supremacist-curious among the American electorate, the 2018 midterm elections will provide voters with an increased opportunity to choose blatant white nationalism as a political strategy. According to the Southern Law Poverty Center, outspoken white nationalist-friendly political candidates are vying for offices in an unprecedented number of races in the states of Arizona, Iowa, Montana, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Illinois, Virginia, California, Florida and Massachusetts.

“I once dated a girl who didn’t like Armenians,” said Joshua Levin, racialist-curious UC Berkeley student. “And I’ve hurled slurs at black players at sporting events, but I’ve never really voted for a known racist before. I’m definitely turned on by the idea of that.”

Anti-Semitism, holocaust denial, hatred against minorities, and anti-immigration rhetoric professed by these various bigoted candidates have been as a clarion call to those seeking to do more than just dabble in the tenets of white racial superiority.

“I find Chris Stewart sexy,” said Julie Covington, Virginia Beach resident. “Plus, I hate cutting my own lawn in the Virginia heat. If we move towards restoring the confederate way of life, I may just have time for Thursday night bowling again.”

Although two of the bigoted candidates campaigning for office have dropped out of their respective races—Former Rep. Tom Tancredo for governor of Colorado and Augustus Invictus for U.S. Senate in Florida—six xenophobes (including three incumbents) are still contending for House seats while four racialists continue to have their eyes on the Senate.

Said Drake Kessler, a Chicagoan dog walker, “I’m glad to throw my support behind Arthur Jones. I am married to a black woman and I’m tired of her hogging the sheets at night. I feel like it’s my time again.”

 
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