UNBIASED POLITICAL SATIRE & HUMOR FOR SNOWFLAKES LIKE YOU.

We Only Report What We Want to Hear. You Decide.

 

Timeless Trump: Trump Through Time

Timeless Trump: Trump Through Time

William Jefferson Trump - 1990


“We must teach our children to resolve their conflicts with words, not weapons. If that doesn’t work, arm their (mostly passivist) teachers with automatic assault rifles.”

 

Ronald Trump – 1987

“Señor Nieto, put up that wall – and pay for it too!”

 

Yogi Trump - 1973

“It ain’t over ‘til it’s over … and we find the missing ballots.”

 

Lyndon Baines Trump - 1968
“I shall not seek, and I will not accept, the nomination of my party for another term as your president. If you truly love me, you will elect me using write in votes, so I don’t have to go looking … er, uh, raise money for a campaign. This job is really eating into my net worth. I’m always sacrificing for you! You have no idea.”
 
 

John Fitzgerald Trump - 1963
“We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon this decade and be the first to do so, just as we were the first to put a communication satellite into orbit, the first to have an animal orbit the planet, the first to send a man into space and the first to send a woman into space. We choose to do these things not because they are easy, but because I stand to make a fortune on the back end.”

 

Richard Millhouse Trump - 1952
“A man down in Texas heard me mention on the FOX morning show, the fact that my son-in-law would like to have a Rolls Royce, and, believe it or not, the day before we left on this campaign trip we got a message from Union Station in Baltimore, saying they had a package for us. We went down to get it. You know what it was?

 

It was a 1926 Silver Ghost, in a crate that he had sent all the way from Texas, black and white, hand-painted pinstripes, and my daughter named it Trekker.

 

And you know, the kids, like all kids, loved the car, and I just want to say this, right now, that regardless of what they say about it, we are going to keep it.”

 

Harry S Trump - 1945
“Damn, only two bombs?”

 

Adolf Trump – 1937
“These aren’t people. These are animals.”

 

Herbert Trump - 1936
“Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt, and boy are we gonna stick it to ‘em!”


 

Franklin Delano Trump - 1932
“This great nation will endure as it has endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear are the immigrants - nameless, unreasoning immigrants that bring unjustified terror which paralyzes good Americans like me.”

 

Woodrow Trump 1917
“I can imagine no greater service to the country than to establish a system of censorship that would give the Executive Branch the ability to review and approve information prior to being released by the media, and not deny to the people of a free republic like our own their indisputable right to criticize their own public officials.”

 

Theodore Trump - 1900
“Speak untruths and carry a big balance; you will go far.”


 

Abraham Trump - 1858
“A house divided against itself cannot stand, so we’re just gonna do everything my way.”

 

Benjamin Trump – 1789
“The Constitution only guarantees the American people the right to pursue happiness. It doesn’t say that the government can’t stand in your way.”

 

Patrick Trump - 1775
“Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased on a margin? I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me a real estate empire and millions of dollars handed to me on a silver platter, or give me death.”

 

Don Quixote Trump - 1605
“Facts are the enemy of truth.”

 

 

Photo by Gage Skidmore  ||  CC-BY-SA-2.0

Fox News Disappointed Sean Hannity Did Not Disclose Personal Relationship With Sponsor Pepto-Bismol

Fox News Disappointed Sean Hannity Did Not Disclose Personal Relationship With Sponsor Pepto-Bismol

Report: Americans Use Of Basic Common Sense Hovering Near Zero

Report: Americans Use Of Basic Common Sense Hovering Near Zero