Florida Man Attempts Gun Control To Dismay Of Friends
Tallahassee, FL -- A Florida Man shocked his friends this week by trying to pass moderate forms of gun control legislation. Florida Man had previously vowed to never lower the age required to purchase a firearm, increase the waiting period for buying a gun, or ban bump stocks.
Florida Man is famous for shoving exotic fish down his pants, getting trapped inside an arcade game, and shooting bullets at passing hurricanes. He encompasses a wide swath of the male population of the state, also known as America’s Penis.
“We honestly don’t know how long it is going to last, this rational and quick thinking,” said one friend wishing to remain anonymous. “We usually have no clue what he’s going to do next, but in this case he seems to be acting in everyone’s best interests. Maybe he’s gone crazy.”