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Reports: Paul Ryan Held That State of the Union Fart in for Over 80 Minutes

Reports: Paul Ryan Held That State of the Union Fart in for Over 80 Minutes

Washington, DC -- A very relieved Paul Ryan was able to hold that huge fart in for over 80 minutes until the end of President Donald Trump’s address on Tuesday evening, according to various accounts.

 

Mike Pence reportedly kept getting “that look” from Ryan, but gently nudged him on the leg several times during the speech. Ryan also seemed to have been readying himself to deliver the wind during big applause breaks.

 

The sheepish Ryan could be seen shifting in his seat and re-adjusting his pants behind the president. Somehow he was able to hold it in for the full hour and twenty minute speech before sneaking into Senator Dick Durbin’s nearby office to release the blow.

 

 
Despondent Chain-Smoking Obama Delivers Backyard State of the Union Response to Cold, Sleepy Michelle and Sasha

Despondent Chain-Smoking Obama Delivers Backyard State of the Union Response to Cold, Sleepy Michelle and Sasha

Lil Uzi Vert Are Words You Never Expected Your Mother To Say, But Here We Are

Lil Uzi Vert Are Words You Never Expected Your Mother To Say, But Here We Are